Not So Scary Episode/Transcript

The following is a transcript from the Gabriel Garza Halloween episode, Not So Scary Episode.

Act 1: An Interstitial Beginning
(Shows the TV show intro, but in G-major and the text after the rock note plays: "Created by GHOSTEO G.")

(Shows the title card with the "Not So Scary Episode" text on a pumpkin)

(Gabriel pops up)

Gabriel: Even though, the name of the episode is called Not So Scary Episode. It's a bit scarier than the regular episodes.

(Gabriel slides down off-screen)

Text: Written by GHOSTEO G. and GHOUL DEVILTE

Gabriel: (off-screen) Whoops! Forgot that name.

(The text "Written by GHOSTEO G. and GHOUL DEVILTE" was changed to the other text that says "Written by GHOSTEO G. and JOSEPH "JOE" DANTE")

Gabriel: (off-screen) That's better.

Text: Written by GHOSTEO G. and JOSEPH "JOE" DANTE

Text: Storyboard by SCARY HALLWAY and CRAIG SCAREMAN

Text: Directed by SCARY WOLF

(Fades to black)

(Fades to the outside of the Halloween-decorated Garza House)

(Cole is dressed up as a vampire, Roge is dressed up as a ghost and Leno is dressed up as a punk)

Cole: Hey, Leno, can I take the extra chocolate bar please?

Leno: No way, man! It's always mine! MINE!

Cole: (neutral) Okay.

(Gabriel is at the doorstep, dressed up as a mummy)

Gabriel: Come inside, guys. We are going to tell spooky stories!

Roge: Spooky stories? (excited) Cool! I like those.

(They go inside)

(They go upstairs to their bedroom)

(Roge, Leno and Cole sit down)

Gabriel: So, brothers, how was your spook-tastic Halloween?

Leno: It was cool.

(Jim looks in Leno's pumpkin basket)

Jim: (sees a chocolate bar) Mouth-watering... chocolate.

(Leno keeps the basket away from Jim)

Leno: (a bit grumpy) Jim, it's mine and you don't get it.

(Claire is dressed up as a princess)

Claire: It wasn't spooky enough.

(Jan is dressed up as a superhero)

Jan: At least, we don't have to deal with Vi--

(Castle thunder sound effect occurs)

Jan: Vio.

(Loy is dressed up as a serial killer)

Loy: It was astounding for me because I scared the people, including Becky's biological grandmother, with my costume. (gets his chainsaw) Don't worry, guys. It's a toy chainsaw.

Roge: Can't we just listen to the spooky stories?

Gabriel: Well, I am just going to get my bullhorn out. (gets his bullhorn out; shouting through it) Ahem, guys! We are going to start telling eerie stories.

(The kids pay attention to Gabriel)

Gabriel: (calm) Well, that did it. Who's gonna start first?

(Becky is dressed up as a vampire)

Becky: I vill!

Cole: Vill? Don't you mean will?

Becky: Vampires replace W's with V's.

Cole: Oh.

Act 2: The Joining
Becky: The story is called "The Joining".

(The scene fades to the story; a house in Bellefonte, PA is shown)

Becky (off-screen): The story takes place in Bellefonte, Pennsylvania, a small town near Sinking Spring. A family vas ready to move to Sinking Spring.

(Leno pops up on the screen)

Leno: How's that scary?

(Leno slides down off-screen)

Becky (off-screen): They vere a typical American middle-class, and they had one son. The son vas a fan of zombie films.

Mallory (off-screen): Cool! The scary part is coming in.

(The parents of the boy were downstairs in the hallway of the house)

Becky (off-screen): The boy's name vas Jack.

The boy's father: Jack! We're leaving to Sinking Spring now! Get your suitcase!

Jack: Coming, Mom and Dad!

Becky (off-screen): Since the boy's dad asked him to get his suitcase, he vent to get the suitcase and they vent outside.

(The family leave the Bellefonte house)

Becky (off-screen): His dad placed a "House for Sale" sign in the front garden.

Jack's father: It's a pity that we couldn't keep the house here and the other one in Sinking Spring.

Jack's mother: It's a shame!

Becky (off-screen): They vent into their car, so that vas their time leaving their old house.

Leno (off-screen): (shouting) Get to the scary part!

Becky (off-screen): (angry) I vill, Leno. (normal) They sang the iconic song "Coming 'Round the Mountain" in the car.

Cole (off-screen): Great!

Jack and his parents: (singing) She'll be coming 'round the mountain when she comes!

Jack: (singing) When she comes! (normal) Who is she? Is it Mom, or some random dead woman?

(His parents laugh)

Jack's father: No, Jack, it's not your mother. Let's continue where we left off.

Becky (off-screen): The boy vas a fan of toilet humor.

Leno (off-screen): (laughing) Ha-ha!

Jack: (singing) We'll be farting 'round the city when we come! (laughing) Ha-ha!

Jack's parents: Oh, Jack!

Jack and his parents: She'll be coming 'round the mountain when she comes!

Jack: (singing) When she comes!

Becky (off-screen): They keep on singing the song for 55 minutes and they were half a mile away from Sinking Spring.

Gabriel (off-screen): I'd be bored by then.

Jack and his parents: (singing) She'll be cooking her favorite sausages when she comes!

Jack: (singing) When she comes!

Becky (off-screen): Vio and his minions, with their evil magical superpowers, made the car crash.

Roge (off-screen): I feel sorry for the family.

(Vio and his gang are standing on the sidewalks)

Becky (off-screen): The same villains, but scarier. Vio had red glowing eyes, and the others had more scarier appearances.

Maxio: Oh, look. A family moving into the city.

Vio: (sneering) Guys, let's make their car... CRASH! (evil laugh) Mwahahahaha!

Jack and his parents: (singing) She'll be comin' down a roa-- (screaming)

(The villains shoot a laser beam, combined from their powers, to control the car and make it crash into the tree)

Jack's mother: Thanks goodness we are still alive.

Becky (off-screen): Luckily, they survived, but they later lost their memories and got put to sleep by Vio so they were in for a big surprise.

Vio: (holding a a sleeping spray) Not for long! (sprays) Mwhahaha!

Jack: (screaming) NOOOOO!!!!!!!

(Fades to Jack, his family, Vio and his henchmen in a dark room at a haunted house)

Becky (off-screen): Jack and his family woke up in a dark room at a haunted Sinking Springian house, and saw Vio and his gang in front of them.

Vio: (sneering) Welcome! I'm Vio, and you must be Jack and his loser parents. (laughing) Hahahaha!

Becky (off-screen): Just like ninjas and magicians, the villains disappear in a puff of smoke so Jack and his parents had to deal with the wacky house.

Maxio: 'Til you join us, we will torture to join us.

(Vio and his minions disappear in a puff of smoke)

Jack's father: I didn't know that was possible outside of magic shows.

(The family run out of the dark room)

Becky (off-screen): The family vent into a fully lit hallway, a big contrast to the dark room they have just left.

Roge (off-screen): And?

Becky (off-screen): They saw a 3 year older version of Gaby, my younger sister, at the other side of the hallway. In fact, they saw two Gabies.

Cole (off-screen): Why Gaby?

Becky (off-screen): That's not very important.

The two Gabies: Come join us, random family! Forever, and ever, and ever.

(The family notice the frozen random people)

Becky (off-screen): Gaby was brainwashed by Vio and got cloned. The Gabies had an ability to hypnotize.

Jack's father: We refuse to join your evil nonsense!

(The parents get hypnotized)

Jack's father: (hypnotized) Nevermind, we will.

Jack: (shouting) Don't, Mom and Dad! You'll get frozen into a statue like the other people.

Becky (off-screen): Jack's parents were successfully hypnotized by the two Agneses, so Jack tried to stop them. Jack's parents ignored him so he decided to literally pull his dad's leg.

(Jack pulls his father's leg)

Jack's father: (hypnotized) What are you doing, Ja-- (normal) I mean, what are they doing to us?

(The two Gabies disappear)

Jack's father: (neutral) Oh, they're gone. (happy) Yes! They're gone! They're gone!

Jack: This is getting awkward!

Jack's mother: What just happened?

Becky (off-screen): Vio and his minions randomly appeared to scare the family.

(Vio and his gang appear out of a puff of smoke; the family escape)

Vio: Ahem, Jack and his parents! (angry in a demonic voice) You dare reject your invitation!

Jack and his parents: (turning around; surprised) Huh?

Vio: (shouting in a very loud demonic voice) YOU MUST GET ERASED FROM EXISTENCE!

(Jack and his parents run from the villains)

Jack and his parents: (screaming) AAAHH!!!

Becky (off-screen): The family run out of the house screaming!

(Cuts to the family outside of the house)

Jack's dad: We better not go to this scary house ever!

Jack's mother: Let's go back to Bellefonte!

Jack's dad: I agree!

(They get into their car and drive away)

(The story ends and fades into reality where Becky is almost finishing the story)

Becky (off-screen): They decided to go back to Bellefonte, and never go back to that scary Sinking Spring again! The end.

(Fades to black)

The Story
(Cuts to the gang in the same room)

Gabriel: (looking at the camera) Just kidding. (talking to his friends) Who's ready to tell another spooky story?

Alsen: Me!

(The camera slowly zooms into Alsen)

Alsen: I, along with Loy, am going to tell you guys about a chain saw invasion in Oregon.

Loy: That's the cool Loy, the best guy that has worn a killer costume!

Claire: You don't need to be egoistic.

(Fades to two boys having ice cream on a fine summer day)

Alsen: Once upon a time, I know that term's overused. But, there were two boys that lived in Portland, Oregon. I know that Portland in Oregon was far away from Sinking Spring in Pennsylvania. Anyway, they were eating yummy ice cream on a fine summer day.

Leno: That's not scary.

Alsen (off-screen): You don't know what's exactly going to happen, Leno. (continuing the story) The two boys were called Jett and Raymond.

Jett: This chocolate and pistachio flavored ice cream is delicious. (keeps on eating) I can really taste the combined flavor.

Raymond: Me too.

Jett: You picked the same flavor? (sees the ice cream that Raymond's eating) Oh.

Alsen (off-screen): Jett's dad realized it's time to go to his grandfather's funeral.

Jett's dad: (looking at his watch) Jett, it's time to go.

Raymond: You guys are going?

Jett's dad: My grandfather's funeral is happening today.

Raymond: I feel sorry for your loss.

Jett: Me too.

Alsen (off-screen): Jett and his dad went into the car to go to the funeral, and Raymond waved.

(Cuts to Jett and his father inside his car)

Raymond: (waving at Jett) Bye, Jett!

Jett and his father: Bye, Raymond!

(They drove away)

Alsen (off-screen): They eventually arrived at a graveyard in Portland.

(Fades to Jett and his dad at a graveyard)

Jett's dad: This is the graveyard where my grandfather was buried.

Jett: What did he die of?

Jett's dad: Well, he died of lung cancer because he was a heavy smoker. (angry) Smoking is bad for you!

(They walked to Jett's dad's grandfather's tombstone; they were shocked)

Alsen (off-screen): Jett and his father went to his grandfather's gravestone and they were in for a big surprise.

(The tombstone is broken and vandalized)

Jett's dad: (angry; shocked) GRRRR!!! What did they do to my grandfather's grave?

Jett: Well, they vandalized and desecrated it!

Jett's dad: Did you do this, Jett?

Jett: Nope! (pointing at the Loy in his serial killer costume holding a chainsaw) I think that guy did.

Loy (off-screen): Jett's dad's tombstone was cut and vandalized, so Jett got blamed for it. Jett said he didn't do it, and then he pointed at me in my Halloween costume holding a chain saw. The chain saw guy was an evil version of myself, so he destroyed the graves in the graveyard.

Roge (off-screen): What were you doing in a Portland, Oregon graveyard anyway?

Loy (off-screen): I don't know.

Alsen (off-screen): Jett tried to communicate with the chain saw guy.

Jett: (talking to Loy) Hey, Chain Saw Man! Why are you destroying people's graveyard?

Alsen (off-screen): The Chain Saw Man said he was going to take over Oregon, the entire United States and the Canadian province British Columbia.

Loy (as the Chain Saw Man): (turning around; evil voice) I'm planning to invade Oregon first, then the entire country and British Columbia!

Jett's dad: Where's British Columbia?

Loy: (puts his hockey mask off) In Canada, stupid! This is why Americans have a bad reputation.

Alsen (off-screen): The Chain Saw Man chain sawed Jett and his dad in half...

Loy: (puts his hockey mask on) Prepare to get sawed! (running towards them)

Jett and his dad: (screaming; running away) AAAAHHHH!!!

(Cuts to black, with a chain saw sound effect occuring)

Alsen (off-screen): And Jett and his maker luckily survived due to cartoon logic.

(Fades to Jett and his dad in hospital beds on opposite sides of the room)

Loy (off-screen): They woke up in a hospital.

Jett: Where am I?

Commercial Interruption
Gabriel (off-screen): Sorry for interrupting you guys, Uncle Loy and Alsen...

(Fades into reality)

Gabriel: But we have to stop the story for a while because of the incoming commercial break.

The kids (minus Gabriel): (sad) AWWWW!

Alsen: If we are on a commercial-free network, this wouldn't happen.

Gabriel: Well too bad, because CBS does have commercials.

Alsen: Okay, sorry about that. (looking at the camera) Stay tuned for the continuation of the story if you have an decent attention span, viewers!

(Fades to black for commercial break)

Act 4: The Continuation of Oregon Chain Saw Invasion and the Addition of A Nightmare in the Miner's Place
(Fades to the gang in the Garza brothers' room)

Gabriel: (looking at the camera) Hey viewers, we're back! (talking to Alsen and Loy) You can continue your story!

Alsen: Okay, where were we? (thinking in his head) Hmmm..... was it the... Oh, nevermind! The characters wake in the hospital. (normal) Ahem, guys.

(They grab the rest of the gang's attention)

(Fades to the Chain Saw Invasion story where Jett and his dad are in the hospital)

Alsen (off-screen): Jett and his dad were in a hospital. Jett was in a hospital bed facing his dad's hospital bed, and a doctor went to Jett's dad.

Doctor: (excited) Hey, young man, you seem to be healing up!

Jett's dad: (surprised) Really? (looks at his body) Oh, yeah. The halves have been connected!

Loy (off-screen): The doctor turned to be the evil me, who Jett and his father met earlier.

Doctor: (sneering) Ha-ha!

Jett's dad: (shocked) Huh? Why are you laughing at me?

Doctor: (shouting) You stink!

(The doctor takes off his disguise and reveals him as Loy in the Jason-like costume)

Jett's dad: (angry) You were the Chain Saw Man that me and Jett met earlier!

Chain Saw Man: (sneering) That's right! Prepare to die for real!

Alsen (off-screen): Jett's dad jumped out of the hospital bed, his first name, Charles, got called out by Jett and unexpectedly transforms into Reddy Krueger.

Leno (off-screen): Cool!

Claire: (sarcastic) How original!

(Charles jumps out of his hospital bed)

Jett (in his hospital bed): Go, Charles!

Charles: (angry; talking to the Chain Saw Man) This means war!

(Charles unexpectedly turns into Reddy Krueger and grows claws)

Alsen (off-screen): The guy clawed the Chain Saw Man's face and kicked him out of the hospital window. They were on the third floor.

Charles: (angry) Hello, my name is Charles. You desecrated my grandfather's tomb. (shouting) Prepare to get clawed!

(Charles claws the Chain Saw Man)

Charles: That's what you get for doing such bad things to me and my son.

Chain Saw Man: (sneering) Ha-ha! At least, I'm not the one who was on the hospital bed.

Charles: Not for long! (kicks Chain Saw Man out of the window) Take that!

(The Chain Saw Man falls out of the window, and is painfully hurt)

Chain Saw Man: Owww!!!!!

Alsen (off-screen): Eventually, Jett and Charles were fully healed and changed Charles' grandfather's tombstone with Raymond and the graveyard digger.

Graveyard digger: Well done, boys. You guys deserve a gold medal each for changing every one of the damaged tombstones.

Jett: Gold medal? Do you do that very often?

Graveyard digger: Nope! We made the gold medals in response of the Jason costume wearer destroying the tombstone.

Jett, Charles and Raymond: Oh!

Graveyard digger: (gives out the medals) Here you go.

(Jett, Charles and Raymond walk out of the graveyard)

Alsen (off-screen): Jett, Raymond and Charles were rewarded by the grave digger with gold medals and walked out of the graveyard. However, they, along with the digger, didn't know that the Chain Saw Man, now a ghost, heard and saw all of that.

(The Chain Saw Man as a ghost floated out of the grave behind the graveyard digger)

Graveyard digger: My work here is done!

Loy (off-screen): The Chain Saw Man floated out of his grave, and said in a frightening voice...

Chain Saw Man (as a ghost): (shouting) BOO! NO, IT ISN'T!

Graveyard digger: (confused) Who said that? (turns around) It was a ghost. (turns away) A ghost? (screaming while running away) AAAHHH!!!!

Alsen (off-screen): The digger ran out of the graveyard screaming.

(Fades to reality)

Alsen and Loy: The end!

(Everyone claps)

Leno: I'd hate to be that guy.

Gabriel: Who wants to tell the next story?

Malcolm: Me!

Gabriel: Okay!

(Fades to the story where Malcolm and Jeffrey are mining underground)

Malcolm (off-screen): This story takes places in a underground place. Me and my best friend Jeffrey were miners and were mining underground.

Cole (off-screen): Is it based on a true story?

Malcolm (off-screen): No, it's a story that I made up. Now back to the story, me and Jeffrey were in a mine cart looking for special diamonds.

Malcolm: (neutral) This underground mine is soooo boring.

Jeffrey: I know, Malcolm, but you may never know what will appear.

Malcolm: How?

Malcolm (off-screen): Their mine cart stopped moving when they reached the bottom of the trail.

Malcolm: We've been here for like a hour and (sad) there's still no sign of diamonds.

Jeffrey: (walking; happy) Oh, Malcolm, stop complaining! We'll mine a diamond in no ti--

(Jeffrey bumps into a sign that says "Do Not Remove This!")

Malcolm: (excited) You found something interesting!

Malcolm (off-screen): Malcolm and Jeffrey noticed a sign that said "Do Not Remove This!"

Gabriel (off-screen): So this is where the story starts to get more... appealing.

Jeffrey: (confused) What idiot would put a sign here?

Malcolm: I guess somebody who took all the diamonds and hiding it under the sign.

Jeffrey: Well, let's check! (pulls the sign) Phew, that was easy.

Malcolm (off-screen): Unexpectedly, an evil god named Plumbutt appeared out of where the sign used to as a puff of purple smoke.

Leno (off-screen): Ha-ha! Plumbutt!

(Plumbutt appeared out of a hole)

Jeffrey: That's strange! Where are the diamonds?

Malcolm: We got a puff of smoke instead.

Plumbutt: (pleased) Finally! After half a decade, Plumbutt is free. Thank you, young ones.

Malcolm: Plumbutt?

Malcolm (off-screen): Plumbutt was hiding in that hole for five years.

Jeffrey: (neutral) Err... you're... w-welcome.

Malcolm (off-screen): Plumbutt tried to make Malcolm and Jeffrey join him.

Plumbutt: (scary) Since Plumbutt is a deity, you shall serve him forever!

Malcolm: No way! I shall not have no other gods.

Jeffrey: You're starting to get suspicious!

Malcolm: Why were you in that hole anyway?

Malcolm (off-screen): Plumbutt explained this backstory about staying in the mine for 5 years.

Plumbutt: (sneering) A few decades ago, I hid in a uranium tube until somewhere in the early 80s, my tube broken and I was freed. I somehow turned into a god and was able to hypnotize the scientists that were in the uranium storage room into supporting me. I forced them to do bad things because bad is cool. However, they got arrested and the company closed down, so I went to other places in Sinking Spring to recruit criminals. I successfully did but when the "goodie-goodies" of the city heard about me, (angry) they just trapped me inside a bottle, dug up a hole in this very mine, put me in this hole and placed a sign over it because no living thing on this planet wants to see me.

(Jeffrey and Malcolm gasped)

Malcolm and Jeffrey: (angry) You're actually evil!

Jeffrey: (frustrated) You only mentioned your backstory to gain sympathy from us.

Malcolm: No evil guys in our town, stupid puff of smoke.

Malcolm (off-screen): Me and Jeffrey got our pickaxes out to attack...

Jeffrey: Let's get our pickaxes out!

(Malcolm and Jeffrey get their pickaxes out)

Malcolm: (attacks Plumbutt) Hi-yah!

Malcolm (off-screen): But Plumbutt had magical powers!

(Plumbutt magically takes away Malcolm and Jeffrey's pickaxes)

Plumbutt: (shouting angrily) How dare you be sacrilegious?

Malcolm: We're not being sacrilegious, we're being sock-licious.

Plumbutt: (sarcastic) Ha-ha-ha! Very funny.

Malcolm: Thanks for laughing!

Act 5: The Continuation of A Nightmare in the Miner's Place
Plumbutt: (frustrated) Stupid boy! I don't actually think that was funny.

Malcolm: I'm really confused about sarcasm... and math.

Jeffrey: He's right!

Malcolm: (talking to Jeffrey) Let's get out of here.

(Malcolm and Jeffrey get outside of the mine, but Jeffrey looked back at the diamonds in the mine)

Jeffrey: What about the diamonds?

Malcolm: Forget about that.

Jeffrey: Why?

Malcolm: Because they're useless.

(Plumbutt followed them)

Plumbutt: Goodbye to your freedom! (blasts everything around them)

(Everything except Plumbutt, Malcolm, Jeffrey and their mine cart disappears)

Malcolm (off-screen): Objects disappeared because of Plumbutt blasting the ground, the cave and the objects.

Malcolm: Everything around us is gone!

Both (Malcolm and Jeffrey): (screaming) AAAAAHHH!!!

(They fall into a endless pit)

Malcolm (off-screen): Me and Jeffrey fell into a endless pit.

Plumbutt: (evil laugh) Ha-ha-ha! You guys are falling in a endless pit.

(Malcolm and Jeffrey land in the 'endless' pit)

Jeffrey: (happy) Phew!

Malcolm: (shouting at Plumbutt) This pit isn't really endless.

Plumbutt: (shocked) What the?

(Malcolm and Jeffrey landed in a 250-feet 'endful' pit filled with snow)

Plumbtt: (angry) Darn it!

(Fades to reality)

Malcolm: That concludes my story.

(Fades to black)

Act 6: The Instrumental Mayonnaise Instruments
(Fades to Gabriel)

Gabriel: Okay viewers, so, here is my last story, The Instrumental Mayonnaise Instruments. (The gang pay attention to Gabriel) Once there was a jar of mayonnaise, mayonnaise is a food condiment which was made in 1806 by Alexandre Viard. It was not an instrument, you know that. But what if mayonnaise was an instrument?

More coming soon!